Tuesday, July 27, 2010

What is SEO? The Most asked Question!

It’s irritating when people ask you about your education, result and job, at least for me it is!. Especially when they asked what do I do? I humbly replied, “SEO”. And the next question without even waiting for a second is, “What is SEO”? This is probably the more common question then “What is your name”?

Without the discrimination of any experience or age or anything all the SEOs will defiantly gonna agree me that this is the most common question as per their professional life. “What is SEO”? lol… and every time we need to play the same recording, the definition available on Wikipedia in order to stay away from other interrogative questions.

Every time we need to start like, “Search engine optimization (SEO) is the process of improving the visibility of a web site or a web page in search engines via the "natural" or un-paid ("organic" or "algorithmic") search results.” Normally people do not ask any question after this in order to maintain the impression that I can understand whatever you said.

I still remember the 1st time I started the internship of SEO and tell my mother about it, she said, “(esy-hi-ho) in English “of no use”. Though it is funny to some extent, but very irritation when you are in love with the search industry or even you like it.

Once I tried to make my younger brother understand about what I do! I said look you Google things right? You get the top 10 listings on the 1st page right? Yes, he said. What I do is I work over the website in such a way that it can get the top 10 rankings in Google from that particular term. (For me I guess it was pretty much cleared) He said, “So, by this you mean you cheat Google...Right?” Damn!

On, my first salary I took my few friends for the treat and as usual hey asked the same question and I find the easy way out and start the SEO rhyme (a definition for wiki) once again. As soon as I finished one of my friend said, “whatever!... you got the good salary right! Now treat us”

I remember, once my office friend decided to resign and I asked a valid reason for that? He said, “Man every time I decided to learn a new technique the next day Google change its algorithm!” He probably hates Google for this but I love it.

I don’t really get any idea to by pass this most common question of my life which always makes me irritated. Do you have any idea? Please speak up!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Yet Another Journey Ends…

I was young, too young to be on a Mic, when I hit the radio for the first time. It was fun, entertaining and different. I was there with my friend just to see the world on the other side of the Mic. It was hard to believe that the people on the other side of the Mic were also human with same; two legs, two hands the only difference was that, they speak a lot and I was shy (dumb).

One room full of people and women with a single point agenda “Keep Quite” and YES I can’t forget that the red light turns on exact at 9 AM Sunday Morning.

The last time I hit the mic was for the segment “Nice to meet you” for Program “From the Campus”. A Interview with the Principal of some College. She was good…study isn’t :p

Beside work, Radio was almost a second home for me. Lots of teaching love and people who care for me and yes! Some people who hate me but they didn’t have any other choice but to ignore me. All over, it was the height of fun and life.

At radio, everyone was unique, like everyone else and I guess that’s the beauty. Can’t forget few names ever in my life because these are the people who support me and appreciate me on my stupid recordings (I laugh loudly when I listen to them now…though m not a genius even now) but I can simply realize that if they were not supportive at that time I can’t get improved.

Again, I don’t think I am genius or perfect but still I think the radio time is over for me... Life will still move on but now I have different priorities and responsibilities in life to deal with.

I have seen the different ups and down, good and bad time at radio and It was the real fun. By reading this I think you can say, “It’s Boring” and as a matter of fact I knew it! But it’s hard for the express the joy associated with Radio Pakistan.

Life is life. It’s time to move on and this is the time to warmly welcome new people to come in…probably this is the time for a new people to come in and rock!!

I know this is the time to say Good Bye but I will obviously gonna miss my friends, teachers and people associated to that place. There is one echo in my mind which will never allow me to forget this heaven that is the punch line “Ye Radio Pakistan hay…” (This is Radio Pakistan!)

I will be more than just happy to help in any manner I can, to the team I have worked with (if possible) and this is not because I am too kind but this is because they have made my life. I was dumb they make me at least some thing. I was nothing and they polished me.

I thank all of the people who helped me in making me what I am today. Special Thanks to Baji, Asif bhai, Sister Baji :p, Man of UK, Folio 3, Faheem, MJ, Ex Warid telecom, Strict Man, Dr. Baqai Uni. And the list goes on… (nice way to hide the real names :) )

Sunday, July 4, 2010


"She" is the word used of the most complex specie I have seen on earth. SHE, the three later word bring different kind of feelings in different human beings...

Let's start with the truth first... SHE, sounds interesting, annoying (most of the times), confused, complex, pointless but yes the only good thing is beautiful. (let the beauty at a side please) Obviously not all the women are same but yes most of the women are and for the people who are women rights activist, friends, it's same as women says "Men are Dog".

Though, I have experienced and researched a lot about this specie and most of the time it was bad experience at least 80 % of them are bad but still She…

…I just looked at her like I look on every other single thing, look and over looked but this time. I tried to forget her but I can’t. She was simply irresistible, one cannot overlook her.

Heart beat becomes fast, blood started to supply more than usual, though I have a bit problem with my eye sight but at that time it becomes 6 x 6. It was hard to believe that she is from the same specie but she was. I am not really sure about all the qualities I mentioned in the beginning but 1 quality what I can clearly see at that time was beauty which was driven me crazy like never before.

She was different, more than just beautiful, awesome and amazing and one of the most rear creatures I have ever seen in my life till yet. I think I started loving her, because when I asked myself questions that suppose if she say No to whatever you have in your mind then (I know it’s too fast for this but I can’t control it!) and after a deep breath, I replied to myself while looking at her “I can kill her”… Oh man! According to me, to die for someone you love is easy, to kill others is bit difficult but to kill the person you love is almost impossible, I was touching that heights.

The Lady in Blue, almost 5.7”, curls hair and oh yes the way she walks… I challenge all the fairy tale beauty queens creators to bring someone like her or not like her try someone closer to her… Damn she was moving towards me, I stand up from my seat, I was feeling like the king of the world, I can clearly see the world under me. Imagining the world with her is different feeling itself.

I am confident enough to communicate well with the people even when they are stupid, but right now I am loosing it big time, really don’t know what to do? How to talk to her, what to do to make her stop for ever. She was fast, actually very fast the distance between or it was displacement (physics: directly from point A to Point B) was almost of 5 to 7 steps… 2 steps and she stops. Her curls were covering half of her face. She tried to manage her hairs and successfully did it with one hand… I know she can never fail. At last she speaks up, “Excuse me!”… Damn there was only me! The current passes through ma body… I was completely dead!

“You are beautiful, It’s True” yes, it’s true…This song is for her only!!... She said, “I am waiting for someone, can I have a seat beside you?” …who the hell will gonna say no, but I couldn’t say anything I tried a lot to speak up…hell lot of feelings and no guts to express… I tried to speak several times but I failed…bloody looser I am.

She sits beside me… oh what a feeling… she can clearly see the endothermic reactions going on under me… hell…. one can easily see the delta heat coming out, bloody worm breaths…

She sits, She waited…She got a call and then she gone… and I… Hell I could not speak up…not even a Hello…!!

I go almost every day to that place for months, I asked several people about her but no result, no clues… stupid me. Every time when GOD blessings are upon me…I am the bloody fool always in the bathroom singing some stupid song…

I don’t really blame me, but anyone can be like me at front of her… Whenever I am relaxed and look back to my good old memories what all I think of is SHE…

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Degree is Degree!

Degree is Degree, no matter fake or legitimate. This is the saying of one of our ministers in Quetta, Mr. Aslam Raisani. You might be shocked and surprised but I am not and before you come up with the question that do I have the fake degree? So before you ask let me clear this thing that I am an idiot so I am struggling for a degree.

While me and a friend were waiting outside the office washroom (A usual practice) he asked, “When these ministers are going to educate themselves?” and I replied, “My friend you need to grow up and as far as the ministers are concern the government officials are well educated even some on the higher ranks (may be, president) are over educated.

The fake degree, mobile snatching, target killing, bomb blast and other non-humanitarian activities are actually our culture, and PEMRA “Pakistan Electronic Media Regulatory Authority” in calibration with the private channels wanted to demolish this culture like the opposition wanted to demolish the government before their usual time (5 fuckin Years). I support opposition; I always support opposition no matter who they are? At least they are doing their work (Opposing the government).

Yes I agree, Degree is a Degree, nothing else. Degree does not make any difference its money; degree does not make you powerful its PR (Political Relationships). So what if you have the legitimate degree? I can show you thousands of people in a county with the genuine degree but are jobless. Show me one person who is jobless with a fake degree!

It may be hard to believe that degree is nothing but a fuckin piece of paper (pardon my language). What all I want is to reconsider few factual problems in Pakistan, two of the most highlighted problems are child labor and Jobless MBAs. Let’s cut the crap that what we can do for them and all but see these problems from the different angle. Look, children have jobs and MBAs are jobless that’s because degree is degree, nothing else, degree is a fuckin piece of shit, degree is not going to give you money or job or financial success.

What can give you above mentioned pleasures? That’s what you have to figure out! Remember a normal person with no schooling is illiterate but a wealthy man with no schooling is a dropout!